Jamie woke me up at 10:30 this morning for a breakfast of pancakes and coffee. She even cut them into little stars! Very cute. After eating, I opened the gifts that they got me, which were very thoughtful. Jamie got me two scented reed diffusers and two DVD's (SNL collections, Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin. Love Schwetty Balls, lol) and Em got me a silver necklace with a stone encrusted circle pendent. Plus, there was chocolate and mocha coloured fingernail polish.
I talked to Bill a few times today, and it looks like he won't make it home in time for us to do anything. Honestly, I don't mind - I got used to do things alone after I was widowed. And even though I'm lonely for him, I'm still grateful that I have him at all and I can't wait for him to get home, mostly because I miss hearing him laugh. Well, I'm kind of low on kisses too.
I thought I'd ask your opinion on an issue that Jamie is having with her new boyfriend of three months. Kyle is twenty-two, and he'll be twenty-three in August. His mom was widowed twenty-one years ago when Kyle was a just a baby, and his sister was almost three.
Since that time, she hasn't recoupled, but she might have dated from time to time.
The issue is, Kyle has been the man of the house since he was little, and his mom is not going to let him go without a fight. At this point in time, he's in charge of any yard work, moving furniture, grocery duty, taking down Christmas lights ... you get the idea. Also, the mom is a dog breeder, and he's involved in most of the day to day care. He's a FT college student and works 20 hours per week in a furniture store.
Last night was the first night that he's been able to come over to see Jamie all week, and about 90 minutes after he arrived, she called and demanded that he go home because she needed to talk to him in person. Apparently, she wanted to attend a wedding today and wanted him home with the dogs, even though Jamie and he have had plans for over a week. Much of the time, he must ask her if it's alright for him to spend the night here. Also, they have a joint bank account and he shares a Visa card with her.
My opinion is that Jamie and Kyle should get to a counselor asap before they end up in an even more serious relationship, because this woman is going to interfere in every aspect of their lives. She has some real boundary issues already - just recently she called him to say that her Dr thinks she's pre-menopausal because she hasn't had her period in a few months. He tries to object to this type of thing, but in the end he doesn't fight it because she can make his life hell, and in the past she's gone into his room and taken things that were important to him, just to get even for something. Just recently, she took a few of the lighters out of his Zippo collection.
Am I the only one that sees some HUGE red flags?
Thanks, I appreciate everyone's opinions!
The thing with Kyle and his mom: We suspect it's been going on so long that they don't realize how inappropriate it is. And with Kyle being almost 23, it's not about him and his relationship with his mom, it's about how he keeps losing one relationship after another. I guess the last three ended when the girls confronted the mother, which caused her to take it to another level and eventually the girls left.
Jamie and Kyle are already pretty involved and declaring love for one another, so it's too late for her to dump him. If they both go to talk to someone, they might learn how to deal with her. Jamie's hoping the therapist will give Kyle some ideas on how to handle the guilt trips she lays on him. If he resists and doesn't think there's a problem, she may have to dump him anyway but that would be a last resort. They're very well suited and a lot alike so it would be sad if they didn't make it.
As for the mom - I'm pretty sure she's in denial. It's not going to be easy.